A cup of coffee with a side of reminiscing.

Mornings like these is when I remember home.
The smell of coffee and the distant drone of the coffee pot waking up with the rest of the house.
I hear the rain hitting the top of the roof, and I remember how you always said you loved that noise.
I'm far older than I should be, and that's also something you used to say. It was more in the form of an apology but at the time I thought it was just a phase. But oh how I wish I could come running home to you now. To hear you opening the back door and for me to come running down the stairs.
For mom, oh that beautiful woman to be singing in the kitchen and making so much noise, kinda like I do now. Oh its crazy how much I'm like that woman now, I used to resent it but now at times I almost revel in it. Its like I'm the only thing that reminds myself of home, because neither of you are really there and I find that oh so wrong.I don't blame you anymore though, don't worry about that. I used to, but the time for holding grudges is long gone and its easier to just remember how much I know you truly loved me at one time.

Remember having dinner at the kitchen table? I do to a T.
All four of us with our own spots, and I don't think we ever changed. You were always at the head of the table with mom on your right and I next to her and your son next to you. Those meals were always so good. I cook now, I don't know if I can hold a candle to mom's cooking but I cook now...

Remember when we'd take trips out to the city. A dinner at Lombardo's a movie after that? Those were such fond memories I have seemingly forgotten after all this time...

 But on mornings like these they come crawling back to me and I find myself there once again. I'm not complaining, I have a great life. But sometimes you know all too well it gets hard. You would know, because its exactly why I'm here and your there and we all have fallen apart and are torn.
Oh the burden we carry is so vast and so deep, No surmount of time can make it feel new. Each one of us a different story, each one with a different point of view. And although I obviously can relate the most to myself I can't help but think of your poor boy. Growing up without you was hell for me but for him, he lost all of his joy. The shell we've enveloped ourselves in is miles thick, and impenetrable to the core. No one can come in, many have tried and to our dismay we still prevail. But it'd be nice if one day, this could all wash away and we could be human once more.